lending it to him?"
　　 "Certainly."
　　 "And why?"
　　 "Because otherwise he would try to borrow it from me." 
否则
"威廉向我借五英磅.我该不该借给他?"
　　 "当然应该."
　　 "为什么?"
　　 "否则他就要向我借了."

　here?"
　　The toughest guy looks at him and says "I am the strongest
　　around here!"
　　The other guy politely asks "Can you help me push my car to
　　the gas station?"
最强壮的人
一个男人闯进酒吧，高声叫道：“谁是这儿最强壮的人。”
　　最强壮的人盯着他说：“我就是，你有什么事儿。”
　　那个人客气的说，“请帮我把车推到加油站。”

An antiques collector was passing a small shop when he noticed a cat on the sidewalk out front, licking milk from a saucer. The man immediately realized the saucer was very old and valuable. He stepped into the shop with an uninterested look and asked to buy the cat. "I'm sorry, " the shop owner said, "but the cat is not for sale: "
　　"

When his wife was expecting their third child, a father decided to tell his two sons, ages seven and nine, the facts of life. He checked out several books from the library on how parents should approach the subject. After stumbling through an explanation, he took a deep breath, and said, "Now, boys, do you have any questions?"
　　"Yes,"

Bill wasn't impressed, "Well, that's nothing. You know the Dead Sea ? My father's the one who killed it!"

A preschooler asked his mother, "Mom, tomorrow our teacher is going to ask who my father is. What should I say?" The mother said, "Just tell her that God is your father!" The next day, the boy went to school, and the teacher asked him, "Who is your father?" Scratching his scalp, the boy could not find an answer to the question.
The teach

The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s.Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s.I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?"
"Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the

1.
Reason of Punishment
One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."
The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?"
The little

1.
I am a Busy Man
One day a bunch of naughty children wanted to make fun of him and said to him:" There are birds' eggs on that tree. Won't you get them for us please? We can't climb up."
Loath to disappoint the children, he was ready to climb the tree. But knowing that the mischievous youngsters would make off with his boot

1.
TWO HEARTS BEATING
Nurse: How do you feel after your operation?
Patient: Quite alright, only I can feel two hearts beating inside me.
Nurse: No wonder the doctor who operated on you was looking for his watch everywhere just now.
两颗心脏在跳动
护士：手术后你感觉怎样？
病人：十分好，只是我能感觉到我体内有两颗心脏在跳动。
护士：怪不得给你

1.
DON'T BE SELFISH
A mother is admonishing her son.
----Now, John, don't be selfish. Let your little brother share the bicycle with you.
----But Mother, I do. I ride it down the hill, and he rides it up the hill.
别太自私
一位母亲在劝告她的儿子。
"听着，约翰，别太自私，让你的弟弟和你共用一辆自行车。" "妈妈，我是让他。我先骑下坡，他再骑上坡。"
2.

1.
HIS FAULT
Billy: Mother, Bobby broke a window.
Mother: How did he do it?
Billy: I threw a rock at him and he ducked.
他的错
比利：妈妈，波比打坏了窗玻璃。
妈妈：他怎么打的？
比利：我向他扔石头，他躲开了。
2.
AN ENERGETIC WIFE
Neighbor: I heard a big noise in front of your house last night. What happened

I urgently needed a few days off work.
But I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave.
I thought that maybe if I acted "Crazy," then he would tell me to take a few days off.
So, I hung upside-down on the ceiling & made funny noises.

Who Should be Given the Present? 礼物该给谁？
A father of five came home with a toy, summoned his children and asked which one of them should be given the present, “Who is the most obedient, never talks back to mother and does everything he or she is told?” he inquired. There was silence and then a chorus of voices: “You pl