The New Teacher
George comes from school on the first of September.
"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.
"I didn‘t like her, Mother, because she said that th

      How Many Rabbits?
Teacher: Now, Jonathan, if I gave you three rabbits and then the next day I gave you five rabbits, how many rabbits would you have?
Jonathan: Nine, sir.
Teacher: Nine?
Jonathan: I'

      The Climate of New Zealand
Teacher: Matthew, what is the climate of New Zealand?
Matthew: Very Cold, sir.
Teacher: Wrong.
Matthew: But, sir! When they send us meat it always arrives frozen!
新西兰的气候

      Half or Five Tenths?
Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths?
Gerald: I''d much rather have the half.
Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.
Gerald: Because you lose t

      My Sister''s Fingers
Teacher: Kevin, why are you late this time?
Kevin: Please sir, I bruised two fingers knocking in a nail at home.
Teacher: I don''t see any bandages.
Kevin: Oh, they weren

      Mother Was too Busy
Teacher: Mike, you''re always asking your father to do your homework instead, and again this time.....
Mike: Pardon, sir, this time at first I would not let him do it, but mother was to

      The Fourth Element
Teacher: What are the four element of nature?
Student: Fire, air, earth, and... and ...
Teacher: And what? Just think it over, what do you wash your hands with?
Student: Soap!
第四元素

      The Biggest in the World
Peter dozed off while his teacher was talking.
Teacher: Peter! Tell us, what''s the biggest in the world?
Peter: Well, well.... eyelids....
Teacher: What? Eyelids?
Pet

      An Unexpected Answer
Teacher: What do elephants have that no other animals have?
Pupil: Little elephants.
出乎意料的回答
老 师：什么东西只有大象才有，其他动物都没有？
小学生：小象。

      An Entrance Examination
In an entrance examination of a conservatory of music, the teacher asked one of the boys, ''What is the most important physiological quality of a musician?"
"To be

      I Don''t Feel Like Getting into an Argument
"Gerald," asked the teacher, "What is the shape of the earth?"
"It''s round," answered Gerald.
"How do

      Someone Is Going to Get a Real Walloping
Student to teacher: I don''t want to frighten you. Miss Forbes, but my father told me that if I failed in maths, someone is going to get a real walloping!

      Mixed Doubles
Teacher of Physical Education: Have you ever seen mixed doubles, boys?
Nick: Yes, sir. Quite often. I saw it even last night.
Teacher: Please tell us something about it.
Nick: Oh, sorry, sir. M

      Nouns
Teacher: A noun is the name of a person or thing. Now, who can give me a noun?
First boy: A cow.
Teacher: Very good. Another noun?
Second boy: Another cow.
名词
教师：名词是一个人或一种物的名称。现在谁能给我举一个名词？

      经典对话一：
男：Can I buy you a drink?（我可以为你买一杯饮料吗？）
女：Actually I''d rather have the money.（不必，我我宁愿留下那些钱。
）
经典对话二：
男：Can I have your name?（直译：我能有你的名字吗？）
女：Why? Don'