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Building Friendship With Ex

[date:2006-12-21] [zize:B M S]

It is always better to break up a relationship peacefully. This is especially true if you still want to keep the friendship after you break up. There is really no use fighting with your partner if your really want to end the relationship. Doing so will only result in anger and resentment from both parties. And for sure, if you don’t break up peacefully, you will have a hard time becoming friends afterwards.

Don’t know how to break up a relationship peacefully? Read and follow the tips below.

1. Accept and recognize that the relationship is indeed over. Doing so will lead to a firm and wise decision. Your decision should never be half-baked. You must be able to come to terms with your own feelings. This may sound easier said than done but this is absolutely necessary. Be honest with yourself. Avoid being in denial, especially about your feelings.

2. Once you have determined that the relationship is over and that it is time to end it formally then you must act quickly. Do not delay what will inevitably happen. Things will only become worse if you put breaking up with your partner on hold. Breaking up will take up extraordinary courage and strength on your part but it will cost you more if you try to postpone it. Try to determine on the right place and time for your break up. But do it soon.

3. Break up with your partner personally. I have heard of individuals who have broken up with their partners through a friend. This is not a good practice. It is actually a sign of disrespect towards your partner. The issue is between you and your partner and no one else you should get involved. It will be hard enough for your partner to learn that you will break up with him but It will definitely be harder for him if he learns it from someone else. At least give him the dignity of learning the news from you. This will also give both of you a chance to say what you want to say to each other.

4. Choose a quiet and private place to meet up when you have finally decided on a date when to tell your partner that you are breaking up with him. This will enable both of you to have an intimate talk. Outside distraction can make it more difficult for both of you to understand each other.

5. Make sure that both you and your partner are calm and rational before you finally break up with him. To do this you must find a time or schedule when both of you are not busy. It is ideal to this on a weekend so work will not be on the way. Do not tell him you want to break with him when either of you is angry or while arguing.

6. Be straightforward. You owe it to your partner to be honest and firm. Avoid being brutal though. Be sensitive to his feelings. Let him understand why you want to break up with him in the first place. Be firm and decisive. I f you really want to break up with him then don’t mislead him that you two are just letting things cool off. This will only lead in more serious problems.

7. Assure your partner that you are open to remaining being friends with him. Tell him that you will never forget his positive qualities and that you appreciate all the things that he has done for you. Also tell him the things that you have learned from your relationship with him. Stress out that you want and that you are ready to move on and that he should do the same.

8. Provide a proper closure to your relationship. This will be beneficial for both of you and will allow both of you to move on. Smoothen out any unresolved issues particularly with finances, ownership, etc. These issues can haunt you both in the future.

9. Be positive and encouraging. This will make the transition easy for both you and your partner. Learn to forgive and ask for forgiveness. Life is too short to hold grudges.


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