As a child， Xiliu was smart and liked to read biographies of ancient sages. She decided to follow the examples of previous worthies and leave behind a reputation that would be noted for generations to come. At the age of nineteen she married Gao Sheng， who had just olst his wife and had a son named Changfu. Ayear later Xiliu gave birth to a boy and named him Changhu. Before long， Gao Sheng， still young， died of an illness， leaving Xiliu to care for her sons. Seeing Changfu was often truant in his studies， Xiliu sent him to work with the shepherd boys as punishment. Changfu could not his knees and asked his mother to allow him to return to school. Xiliu refused， and Changfu， like a beggar， huddled himself up with cold. A grandmother in the village inter ceded and took care of the boy. Xiliu told her，"If Changfu is ready to take a beating of 100 strokes， I'll take him back."Changfu decided that he would take the beating. Aware of Changfu's genuine repentance for his errors， Xiliu did not beat him and asked him to continue his studies.
Changhu was a slow-minded child， so Xiliu asked him to quit school and work in the fields. But Changhu was so lazy that he often neglected work. Xiliu then asked him to engage in trade， but he used up all his money in gambling. At last， Xiliu sent him to Luoyang to sell goods， where he was put into jail for using fake silver in a whorehouse. In jail he suffered a lot. One day Xiliu called Changfu in and said："I gave the fake silver to your brother on purpose， intending to make him suffer. Now you go and get him out."Back home， Changhu knelt before his mother， bitterly remorseful. He finally gave up evil and returned to good. Fellow villagers then began to understand Xiliu. She loved her children by tempering them in sufferings.
《聊斋志异》中的故事。细柳从小聪明，喜读圣人烈传，立志长大后效仿前贤，流芳百世。她十九岁嫁给丧偶不久的高生，前妻留一子名长福。一年后，细柳又生一子名长怙。高生命短，不久病故，细柳和两个儿子相依为命。大儿长福不用功读书，经常逃学，细柳让他和牧童一块干活。没几天，长福熬不住，跪求母亲让他再读书，细柳不允。乡亲邻居都责备细柳。冬天到了，长福冻得缩头缩脑如同乞丐，村中一老妇为孩子说情，细柳说：“如果长福肯挨一百棍就来见我。”长福情愿挨打。细柳见他悔过，没打他，让长福继续读书。长怙大脑迟钝，细柳让他弃文务农，但长怙懒惰经常逃工；细柳让他经商，长怙把本钱赌光。后来，细柳让长怙去洛阳贩货，他因用假银逛妓院而入狱，受尽磨难，一天，细柳把长福叫来说：“你弟弟这次出去，是我有意给他假银，让他吃尽苦头，你现在救他吧！”长怙回来后跪在母亲面前，悔恨交加，从此改邪归正。这时乡亲们才明白，细柳让孩子在磨难中锻炼，才是真正爱孩子。
